Pardek's Search For Dr Pepper
by BewilderedFemale
Summary: Pardek travels to Earth in search of ... You'll just have to read the story to find out won't you! :-P


**I felt like I needed to step away from writing all of these serious-drama filled stories and do something more… ME! And thus this one-shot is born. This story was of course inspired by another story thyme2read and Lorna Winters are writing called "Pardek meet's his match" I'm so very glad that these wonderful ladies took it upon themselves to write that story as I had no idea how much fun it would be to have him added into our pointy-eared repertoire!  
****I've said it before and I'll say it again; you gotta love a rotund Romulan!****  
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**What's the point of this story? It makes me smile :-) Hopefully it'll make you smile too!**

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**Pardek's Search For Dr. Pepper**

Pardek had been through a rough past couple of days. Not only having to deal with new negotiations at the senate, but also because he had decided that he needed to try and lose a couple of pounds and began a juicing fast. He felt like he was in a fog, his head hurt, his body felt weak, it was unlike anything he had felt before. He just couldn't understand how feeling this way was healthy. He sighed loudly and looked at the time, only forty five minutes had passed since his diet had commenced and already the withdrawals were that severe, it was going to be a very long day.

"Say.. how do you do it Senator Vreenak?" Pardek asked as they were leaving the negotiation chamber and heading back to their offices.

Vreenak blinked. "Do what exactly?"

"You know…" Pardek whispered in a way as if about to divulge his most intimate secret. Vreenak leaned forward, curious as to what Pardek was talking of.

"How do you…. Stay so skeletal?"

Vreenak narrowed his eyes at him, it wasn't the first time that his appearance was the cause of jokes between other Senators, but one look at Pardek allowed him to understand that he was absolutely serious.

"You really want to know don't you?" Vreenak asked in amusement.

Pardek nodded.

"Well… The truth is that… Food doesn't really phase me Senator, now Kali-fal… that is an entirely different matter."

"So.. you don't have like a favorite dish?" Pardek asked.

"Oh well.. My wife likes to prepare Collard greens sometimes, and I thoroughly enjoy eating that, especially since she's a Vegan, the majority of what she makes is leafy and green, just what I like! And I'm not really into sweets…although my son…. He is a walking Dr. Pepper…."

"Dr. Pepper? Who is this doctor, and can he help me lose weight?" Vreenak was about to reply, but several guards interrupted their conversation and began ushering him away to an emergency meeting. Pardek tried to cut in but getting through the guards was nearly impossible and it simply seemed like Pardek was rustling rotundly around but before he knew it; Vreenak was quickly ushered into a flitter and sped off the premises.

Pardek watched the vehicle until it was no longer in sight, it was then that he realized that he'd have to find out who this Dr. Pepper was himself.

OoOoOoOo

Later that day, Pardek did some research to try to find out more about this Doctor Pepper but all of the responses that came up directed him to Earth. At first he couldn't understand it but then he realized that Vreenak was married to a human and it was very possible that his son spent much time on Earth.

"That means that I'm going to have to go to Earth!" Pardek decided, so he made the necessary arrangements and took the next available shuttle out to Earth. The shuttle landed in New York, and it seemed as good of a place as any to begin his search, trouble was that everywhere he turned it seemed like there was delicious food everywhere. The smell was driving him insane, especially from these triangular slices the humans called pizza. He watched how they'd happily bite into it with smiles on their faces and decided that something that made the humans that happy could definitely not be a bad thing so he walked into a pizza shop where a friendly Italian man saluted him. "What can I get for you today?"  
"I.. I guess I'd like pizza." Pardek replied.

"How many slices?"

"Uhhh.. How much does one usually require to get full?" Pardek asked.

"We have a combo special of two slices and a drink, that's usually what people get."

"Then I shall get that as well." He said with a slight bounce of his heels. He could start his diet back up again when he returned to Romulus, and with any luck he'd find Doctor Pepper and find an even easier way to lose weight. In no time at all, two steaming slices of fresh hot pizza were placed before him, and the moment that his teeth sunk into the pizza, it was as if he had been born again. Tears began to form in his eyes as he hungrily ate the pizza marveling at the crispy crust and gooey cheese; absolute perfection! He then ordered two more slices, when he was done, the Italian man suggested that he go across the street to a bakery where apparently they made desserts called:

"Cano..Calini?" He asked in confusion to the shop keeper. She smiled and motioned towards a case where there were many different kinds of cannoli. Plain, chocolate chip, dark chocolate, macadamia, pine nut, pistachio, and many more, he was quite confused as to what to get so he ended up just sticking with plain. It was of course very enjoyable but he couldn't stick around for he knew he had come to Earth with a purpose and that purpose was to find Doctor Pepper!

"Before you leave town sir! You might want to try going to Katz delicatessen, they make the best pastrami sandwiches in all New York!" He didn't know what Pastrami was, but he definitely knew what sandwiches were, and they were quite delicious so over to Katz he went where he sat down and marveled at the mile high sandwich stacked before him.  
"These humans sure know how to eat!" He exclaimed happy as rubbed his hands together and then tucked his napkin inside his collar before attacking the sandwich.

OoOoOoOoOoOoO

Pardek soon found out that while he very much liked New York, New York did not like his waist line. He groaned angrily as he stepped off the scale and realized he had gained eight pounds since arriving. He knew this couldn't continue so he did what he should have initially done the moment he arrived on Earth and called Vreenak's son Brenak.

He ended up having to travel to Florida where it was far too humid for his liking, but the warm weather did agree with him. Pardek made his way towards the meeting spot which consisted of having to wade through the sand, it was quite uncomfortable but he was relieved when he saw Brenak sitting in an open air bar in his swimsuit with his surf board propped next to him having a soda. He understood why the boy chose to live on Earth, he seemed more human than Romulan in both appearance and style.

"Do they serve food here?" Pardek asked after they introduced themselves.

"Sort of, your usual bar fare, wings, hamburgers, fries, oysters,"

"I'll have that." Pardek said to the waitress.

"You'll have what exactly?" Brenak asked.

"All of it." Pardek replied with a wave of his hand as he took off his shoe and tilted it upside down so the sand could escape.

"What's that you're drinking?" Pardek asked him. "This? Dr. Pepper.

Pardek blinked at Brenak's reply. "I came here looking for Doctor Pepper so how could you… Was that meant as a joke?"

Brenak laughed but saw this as a perfect opportunity to get in on a prank; the old timer obviously didn't know what Dr. Pepper was.

"Did you come here to Earth in search of a Doctor Pepper?" Brenak asked.

"Yes! Your father mentioned him to me!" He replied, just then however, the waitress arrived with a large tray filled with the plates of wings, burgers, fries, and oysters on the half shell. Pardek arranged the plates lined up one after the other in the space in front of him. Brenak raised a brow. "Why exactly are you looking to find this doctor anyway?"

"Well…" Pardek said in between bites of his chicken wings. "Since your father mentioned him, I figured he'd be able to help me with my diet."

Brenak had to bite his lip in order to not laugh. "When you finish eating, I'm going to take you straight to him, but we're gonna have to take a shuttle, he's located up in Waco, Texas."

"Oh? I take it that he's very popular then?"

"Extremely; I might just be his biggest fan." Brenak replied whilst lifting his empty glass towards the waitress, she nodded and went to get him a refill. When it seemed like Pardek was done, Brenak got up from his seat and made to grab his surf board when he noticed Pardek browsing the menu again. "Umm.. I think now would be a good time to take off if we're gonna see him today." Brenak said.

"But… Aren't we going to order dessert?" Pardek asked.

"We'll get some on the way." Brenak said as he helped him out of his seat.

They took the shuttle and landed in Waco, Texas a few hours later. There were many tourists walking towards the building and Brenak watched with amusement as a section of the soda manufacturing building had a huge sign in big burgundy and white letters that said: "Dr Pepper"

"Amazing!" Pardek said in awe. "He really is famous!"

"Yeah, let's go inside." Brenak said as he led the way. There were clusters of people all around and they had to check in at the registering booth and wait until a tour guide was available. Pardek took this time to have a look around and realized that there were many black and white photographs on the walls, but what he noticed more than anything was that all of them seem to be drinking something and then he saw the words written on the bottle; it was then that everything finally began to make sense in his mind and he realized the truth.

He gave Brenak a venomous glare. "There is no Dr Pepper!" He yelled angrily as he threw his fists in the air.

Brenak raised his hands defensively. "Hey! Don't be mad tubs, aren't you glad that we came here anyway? This place is magical, you'll see!"

"Why did you lie? Why didn't you just tell me that there really isn't a Dr. Pepper? I could have been back home by now!"

"Oh, but you're mistaken sir, for there is a Dr. Pepper." Came an old voice. They both turned around to see an old man with snow white hair and a warm smile on his face.

"No way!" Brenak said in awe. "I am the descendant of the man who sold the original recipe to Pepsi and Coke so in a sense; I am Dr Pepper."

At that moment Brenak got down on his knees and began to bow towards the old man. "I am honored sir, for I live and breathe Dr. Pepper."

The old man laughed. "You fellows are quite curious; I take it you are not of Earth."

"Well I am, but tubs here is from Romulus." Brenak replied. Just then, a woman with a tray of Dr Pepper samples passed by and he grabbed a cup and drank it down in one gulp and then placed the empty cup back on the tray without her noticing.  
The old man laughed heartily and waved them over to follow him. Security was about to step forward but when the old man waved him off, they took a step back which caused Brenak to smile widely and do an odd dance. "I'm coming through, that's right! Make way for Brenak; oh yeah!"

The old man ultimately led them to his office that was filled with all kinds of toys, gadgets and other Dr Pepper memorabilia. Brenak was beside himself and quickly began to fiddle around with anything he could lay his hands on, even grabbing an old scooter and riding around in the small office. "This is so awesome! I want to live here!" He exclaimed.

Pardek on the other hand while amused with all the contraptions still couldn't help but feel disappointed. This whole time he thought he would meet the man that would help him with his diet, only to find that he produces a soft drink that probably does the opposite of what he sought.

"Well, I don't think that that is allowed son, but since you all seem to be such enthusiasts of my family's soft drink I'll tell you what."  
He then opened the drawer in his desk and pulled out two small bottle shaped devices. Brenak looked at it in awe. "What does it do?"

"That my boy is a Dr Pepper replicator!"

"Get out!" Brenak exclaimed. "This little thing?"

"Here, let me show you." The old man then took one of his own and placed it against the wall; it immediately latched itself on the wall and began to make quite a bit of noise as the metal expanded and then hallowed out an area for the soda to be dispensed. Brenak was of course the first one to test it out and made quite a scene.  
Pardek sighed as he looked at the time, once they'd leave he'd grab something to eat and then head back home. He was still watching Brenak as he chugged the soda when a young woman walked in.

"Mr. Sloan, these are the files that you requested." She said as she handed him a small computer chip. Pardek did a double take; never had he laid eyes on such an agreeable female. She was petite with dark skin and long wavy hair that just reached her waist. She looked up at him and smiled shyly.

"Thank you Priscilla! These gentlemen are from Romulus, I was just showing them my office!"

Her large green eyes lit up. "Romulus! I had no idea that Dr Pepper was popular outside of Earth!" She then looked towards Brenak who was currently trying to slide his head under the dispenser; he tapped the button and opened his mouth so the stream went into his mouth directly.

Pardek looked at the young woman up and down with much approval in his eyes before he asked the both of them. "Say, since I'm not from around here, perhaps you could suggest a place where I might get something good to eat."

"Steaks are quite popular here…" Priscilla replied, a slight blush growing on her cheeks. "Perhaps you'd like to join me since I was planning on eating something like that myself after work."

Pardek smiled widely. "That would be divine!

They walked out of the old man's office together talking, and it struck Pardek that the trip had not been such a total waste after all. Not only did he get to try many new delicious foods, but he had met a very agreeable female too.

"Prissy and Pardek… has a nice ring to it." He thought to himself as they made their way to the restaurant.

**The End!**


End file.
